Memories & Food
MEMORIES ARE TRICKY!
Why do we recall events so differently from one another? How could I be certain my grandparent’s home on Shelbyville Road was sold after my grandmother died, but two of my cousins know for sure that the property sold prior to her death? Nancy writes, “With respect to the Shelbyville Rd house, Gina and I both remember it being sold before Grandma died.” (CLICK HERE to read Nancy’s email and a lovely tribute to Grandma; go to the end of the page to read the full text). After receiving Nancy’s comment I felt a panic. Are any of my memories reliable? How much of our family’s oral history is correct? A little research on memory seemed to be in order.
A LITTLE RESEARCH
According to the research, our memories are “very unreliable.” Dr. Charles Brainerd, a Cornell University professor, states… “A key rule about memory change over time is what we call fade-to-gist.†He goes on to explain in a Healthline interview... “… we lose the details of experience rapidly but retain our understanding of its gist much longer. After attending a baseball game, we may quickly forget what the score was, who pitched, and what we had to eat, but not that our team won and we had a fun evening.†So we remember the “gist,” and because our brains hate gaps, we simply fill in the missing pieces with inaccuracies. I remembered the property sold, just not the detail of when.
SO?
So are any memories reliable? Turns out the answer to that question is complicated; trauma and addiction, as well as other factors, play a role. After two days of reading, I’m on overload, especially since trauma and alcohol addiction are common in my family history! The research is deep in these two areas. Two papers, the Harvard research paper, “How Addiction Hijacks The Brain” and “Traumatic Stress On The Brain” by J. Douglas Bremner, MD, left me numb. When my Grandma in Louisville rejected any of my attempts to resurrect her childhood memories, were my requests deeply painful? Was I asking her to recall memories she buried and had no interest in retrieving? And my grandma in Cincinnati, who shared how a boy lost his legs stepping on a land mine during the war; how did she live with those awful memories, did they haunt her? Now, there’s clarity. Both my grandmothers lived through their early lives in more difficult circumstances than I’d cared to admit. Only NOW am I beginning to understand the full scope of their suffering and their deep desire to build a better life for themselves and their children. They were determined to live in the present and be hopeful. They were both deeply religious. Their faith gave them the strength and courage to endure their hardships!
A BRIGHT SPOT!
What in the world does this have to do with Delicious Memories? Well, the bright spot is that our sense of smell is closely linked to our memories. My grandmothers, and our ancestors, knew that yummy food, the taste and smell of our favorites, were “tools” to elevate good moods and emotions. They cooked and baked up happy memories with love. We continue to prepare these same delicious memories for our families. Home cooked food and good company are the way to nourish both our bodies and our minds.
DEEP IN THE SUBCONSCIOUS
These delicious memories go so deep that they continually move us to habitual actions that we consciously want to STOP, like overeating! Case in point is a recent trip I made to Cincinnati to visit with high school friends and family. On Thursday evening, I attended our annual Friend’s Night. About 10 women showed up and, yes, Ruth brought her famous iced sugar cookies. We ate, drank, talked and laughed for about four hours straight. As we were discussing religion, someone wondered out loud about “EJACULATIONS” and “why the heck the church thought that was a good name for a short prayer?” Just that comment from out of nowhere got the room rolling. I joined in and got to laughing so hard my stomach hurt (but that could have been from the two Manhattans and ten sugar cookies I consumed). I’m getting old but believe me, in that moment, even though I’m almost 70, I acted like a teenager. The weekend fun continued with a visit with my father (who confirmed Nancy’s good memory) and ended Sunday, after a Saturday evening splurge at the Gromada Mardi Gras Fund Raiser. On Monday morning the scale shamed me with a five pound gain! Why do I throw caution to wind during these occasions? The best source to read about this common “what-the-hell” phenomenon is The Hungry Brain by Stephen J. Guyenet, PhD. CLICK HERE to view a weekend of fun with my MND Friends.
MEMORY MENU
Finally, my research helped me develop a new D-M MENU. Turns out there are a few food items we’ve enjoyed for generations that are found to be consistent memory boosters. The menu features three foods: coffee, eggs and walnuts. CLICK HERE to view this brain-boosting menu and how to prepare it for your family. Also visit the new recipe section “COFFEE DRINKS.” There you will enjoy pictures of an especially fun delicious-memory adventure to the world’s largest Starbucks, a visit I made with my sister, MJ, and cousins, Mary Sue and Gina. The Starbucks Reserve Roastery was, as their brother, Lou, so eloquently stated, a place where we experienced “money extraction from dumb ass customers!”
